the case of the disappearing marriages

I believe in marriage.  I believe that the only acceptable reason to end a marriage is because of cheating, emotional & physical abuse…you know, the big stuff.  Not because you’re tired of living with that person.  Not because you fought over whose turn it is to take out the trash.  Not because one likes to play video games and the other doesn’t.  These are all things you should have figured out before you got married.  They are quirks you have agreed to live with “till death do us part.”  Granted people can change from the wonderful person you married, but, that’s also the reason there’s the line “for better or worse” in marriage vows.

A and I will be celebrating our 2 year anniversary in March.  We both agree that the last 2 years have been wonderful.  Overall.  We have had ridiculous fights that last days, but, in the end, we still love each other and are determined to make our marriage last.

Unfortunately, it seems like around us marriages are dropping like flies.  There are 4 couples that got married just before or after us, who have called it quits.  Two because of adultery, one because of the famous ‘irreconcilable differences’ and the other for reasons I’m not aware of. 

All just over or around the 2 year mark.  Isn’t that sad?  I find it sad.  A and I look at these marriages and try to dissect where they went wrong, so that we can learn and not have to follow the same course. 

I’m incandescently, head-over-heels in love with A.  Sure, I get frustrated, and I know he does too, but does that mean we are going to give up?  Does that mean that I suddenly love him less?  Does it mean I no longer want to live with him for the rest of my life?  No, of course not. 

But, maybe we are different.  My relationship status on Facebook doesn’t teeter-totter between ‘married’ and ‘it’s complicated’ and ‘single’.  It doesn’t disappear because we had a fight.  It’s constant.  We are constant.  Despite fights and disagreements, we remain united.   We work at our marriage constantly.  We apply the counsel in the Bible.  We do not take our relationship for granted. 

the undomestic housewife

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