I want you

I want you.
Just you.

I miss you.  It may seem silly, since I never got to meet you.  I didn’t get to know you.  I didn’t get to feel you move within me.  You were gone so fast. 

But, still, I want you.  You would have been my firstborn.  I dream of you.  To me you’ll always be a curly-haired girl, though you may have been a boy.  I imagine you pouting.  I cannot imagine you smiling.  Smiling would have meant you were happy.  Seems impossible.  If you’d been happy you wouldn’t have…  That’s silly thinking, I know. 

But, it doesn’t change how much I miss you.  You’ll always be there – in the eyes and smiles of your future siblings (if that ever happens!).  I will watch them smile and laugh and play and miss you, my darling child, because no one will ever replace you.

– this post inspired by prompt #5 in the Writing Workshop from sleepisfortheweak.org.uk

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