Would you? (a work-in-progress)

My arms ache from the weight they’ve never known

The lullabies never sung, scratch tirelessly at my throat

The feel of your soft skin, cradled against my chest

A voice I’ll never know, whispering, “Mommy I love you.”

The goodnight stories we’ll never read

Cuddles and kisses we’ll never feel

Whispered conversations we’ll never have

Giggles and laughter we’ll never hear

Days and weeks and months and years

That we’ll never share

Days and weeks and months and years

and all the things I’m left to ponder

Would your hair been blonde and curly?

Would your eyelashes be as long as your daddy’s?

Would you learn to read at three?

Would you be shy like your mommy?

All the things I’ll never know

All the love you’ll never feel

Every day that passes I think of you

And miss you, my dear baby.

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6 thoughts on “Would you? (a work-in-progress)

  1. Oh dear… I want to reach out and give you hugs. A friend just lost her baby before born… you can see the pain in her eyes… and I can feel them through your words.

    I loved how you used the repitition of words… of questions. Great writing…

  2. And now you’ve made me cry this morning. If we could, I would love to get together with you and talk all this out. I believe you understand better than anyone (even my husband) the pain associated with miscarriage and the ambiguity that comes from how to grieve. Thank you for this lovely poem.

    • Aww… Amber.. I totally didn’t mean to make you cry. I wish we lived closer together.. I would love to sit down and have coffee.. and meet those gorgeous babies of yours. Maybe one day I’ll make it down to where you live :)

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