We have a 100 gallon salt water tank which is my husband’s ‘baby’. We jokingly refer to the fish as our children – you know the kind that stay perfectly contained in their space and don’t scream or cry or cause any ruckus… So completely fictional type of children. We know that children will be nothing like having fish… Or at least I thought we did. This conversation with AMP raised a few suspicions the other day.
We’re in the middle of renovating the basement, and have finally come to the part where we can pick paint colors. As I’m flipping through flyers from the hardware store, I notice a sale on outdoor paint. Our porch railings could use a coat of paint, because a lot has chipped off with the endless rain.
Me: We should get some of this paint.
AMP: For the basement?!
Me: No, for the porch… Or are we not going to do it this year?
AMP: We’ll see how the basement goes. Painting the porch can be something you do while on maternity leave.
Me: Um.. you expect me to paint the porch while having a newborn?
AMP: Yea, well you can just leave the baby inside.
Me: Clearly you know nothing about newborns love.
AMP: Yea, just put them in a crib or something and they can just wander around that – like when we get a new fish and we put it in a quarantine tank for a while. Why else is do you buy a crib? (Silence) What are you doing?
Me: Getting paper to write this down…I’ve been needing a blog post idea.
Ladies, I introduce the father of my future children…
Remind me not to leave him alone with the kid till the child is at least 3 or maybe 12.