Life in Undomestic Land

The thing about trying to get pregnant when you’re already an overanalyzer and research addict is that you do things like google: “8dpo allergy symptoms” “tww 8dpo symptoms with bfp”.

Seriously, I should be banned from google.

And, this month we weren’t even trying, really.  Though, we did push our cut-off date for sex a little further than I should have when I wasn’t paying as strict attention to the calendar as I should have.

Which means, I’m analyzing everything again.

And, will continue to till my period shows up right on schedule on Monday.

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Our puppy is now just over one years old.  We’ve completed three levels of obedience course, with him just finishing his Advanced Level One which he passed with 94%.  Yay ShNo!  He still has a lot of work to do (huskies are horrible on recall — and seem to feel that listening is optional), but I see a lot of improvement.  We’re spending a lot of time training him – because I figure that the better behaved he is, the easier it will be when we bring a baby home.  Plus, it’s kinda fun.

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Family drama never seems to end… It’s not something I talk about on this blog, but it’s so ridiculous and it amazes me how immature people can be.  And, how us younger ones are more capable of acting like adults than some of the older ones.

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I’m addicted to pinterest…. I spend a lot of time on there on my personal site, but am trying to do more on my pinterest for this blog..  I’ve found millions of ideas I’d like to try – too bad I don’t have the time or money for them.

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The ridiculous basement is almost done.  We’re down to baseboards and painting doors.  Hoping it gets done before our NY trip.  After which we’ll turn around and sell the house and buy a place where we can actually rent out a portion of the house, making the mortgage payments a little easier to handle when we have a baby.

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92 days till New York!! :)

Maybe time to actually start planning the details of that trip… :)

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Losing weight is not going well… Seems easy to come up with excuses to put off using the elliptical – or to eat something junky.  But, I’m trying to be more conscientious.. Hard the last couple days because I’m starving ALL THE TIME!  So not helping.

And his award is…

So, ShNo turned six months old on Sunday.  And, he was rewarded with a trip to the vet this morning to get some bodily parts snipped off. 

The last few days leading up to the appointment I’ve been a bit emotional.  I did a lot of research and decided that having him neutered was the best decision for us, but he kept looking at me with these sad, knowing eyes, and I would feel horrible.

And, then this morning, he was all sweetness and cuddliness – and the guilt kept building up.

But, I dropped him off at the vet this morning.  I’m expecting a call around 3 to be told how surgery went and what time I can pick him up. 

I keep picturing him, sitting sadly in the kennel with no one playing with him all morning, and then laying on a table all drugged up and ….

Makes me worried about what I’ll be like if any child of mine needs to undergo any sort of procedure.
 

There was a plan…

There was a plan. 

I had an appointment at the gynecologist in June.  I would get a six-month prescription on my birth control, and once that lapsed, I would be off the pill, beginning our journey in trying to conceive.

Six months seemed endless.  Unnecessary. We were ready now.  Well, I was ready now.

And, then my appointment came.  And, accidentally I walked away with a three-month prescription.  And, we got a puppy.  And, well, three months was not long enough.  We are not ready.

And, as we drove along one day, words spilled out of my month – telling my husband that maybe we should wait longer.  Another three months.  And, he jumped at the chance.  And, the next day, I cursed my rambling mouth.

But, that’s the plan now.  I have a doctor’s appointment to get my last six-months of pills.  The last six months of ingesting a little pink pill every day.  The last six months about us.  Only us.  And, well the puppy.

And, I’m equal parts excitement and terrified. Excited we are closer to embarking on this journey.  Terrified about the path of trying to conceive and all the unknowns.

Here’s to the next six months of us not trying.  And, I’m going to enjoy it.

ShNo

Image representing Kijiji as depicted in Crunc...

Image via CrunchBase

So, you know how when you sit down at the computer and open your Internet browser, there are certain websites you automatically open… Like blogs, Twitter, Facebook, Gmail Reader, etc.

One of mine is Kijiji where I would sift through the hundreds of ads on available puppies and annoy my husband with links or pictures of my favorites along with the “Aww, isn’t he cute?!?!” 

Which would inevitably lead to, “Well, if you want it, we should get it” and then me hemming-and-hawing about price, commitment factor, etc…And, then we wouldn’t get the dog, and I would go back to my daily browsing of the website for new dogs, agreeing with his assessment that we should wait to get a puppy… at least until I stumbled across an ad for another beautiful dog.

One Friday, I show him a picture of an adorable dog for sale, a Husky/German Shepherd cross. 

The next day we’re traveling five hours to pick up a red-and-white Siberian Husky, that he’d found after doing some research of his own.

Yup, we have a puppy.  He was eight weeks old when we brought him home, and he turns 10 weeks tomorrow. 

Meet ShNo (not his real name):

He is adorable, but exhausting.  I keep telling people I’ll only have kids if I can survive this first year of puppyhood. 

But, I’m still incredibly in love with my new puppy, and my husband for getting him for me… So in love, I’m getting up with ShNo at 5am…and we all know how much I love my sleep.

Any tips on raising a puppy?  Or have a picture of your own little puppy to share?

Poor AMP…

Baby Shiba inu 柴犬

Image by shinkusano via Flickr

I think I’m driving my husband crazy… Actually, I know I am.  Surprisingly, he’s dealing with it very well.  Perhaps it’s partly because I warned him that he can’t hold me responsible for being an emotional wreck for the next few weeks, as the baby’s would-have-been due-date nears. 

But, still… I think the man deserves an award.  He’s put up with my moodiness… hugs me during my random crying spells… has been spending lots of time with me, and hasn’t screamed when I showed him a picture of a puppy for the 100th time and then said no, when he asks if he should go buy it for me.

I just don’t know if I can commit to a puppy.  I know that might sound ridiculous, since I want AMP to commit to having a baby – which I know is a much bigger deal, but getting a puppy seems like such an immediate, huge step, and well…I’m not sure our current lifestyle is conducive to it.  And, anyways, having a baby and getting a puppy are such totally different things.

But, I still keep looking at ads, and showing them to him, and telling him how much I want this or that puppy, but balking at the price being asked.  And then insisting, that no, we shouldn’t spend the money and he shouldn’t go out and get it for me.

The other thing is, with how bad my allergies have been, I want to get tested for dog allergies, before we spend loads of money on a puppy I can’t even be around without sneezing or breaking into hives.  My allergist appointment is a few weeks away, so I should have an answer soon.

But, even if I’m not allergic, I don’t know if I should get a puppy.  I think (or actually, I know) that this puppy obsession is just a mask – I’m trying to replace the baby – and the puppy won’t be able to do that.  Nothing can replace the baby.

So, I’m back to square one, with no idea of what to do….I think I’m driving myself crazy, never mind poor AMP.

when things seem too good to be true

I’m incredibly disappointed at the moment.  After the talk AMP and I had, I really got into the idea of getting a puppy.  Perhaps it’ll take the edge of the baby obsession, or distract me long enough to give my dear husband some more time.  So, I turned my attention to researching puppies – how big they get, temperament, how much they shed and bark, etc.  

Originally I wanted a Chocolate Labrador Retriever, but AMP had Labs and Retrievers growing up and wanted something different.  My other picks were a Rottweiler, a German Shepherd, a Beagle, or Border Collie.  Each had their pros and cons.  I spent a few hours on the local Buy & Sell, and well, found my dream dog – a black Shiba Inu.  We adopted a 7-year-old red one when I was 12, and he passed seven years later of old age.  I love their temperament, they are so stinking cute, and I was so excited to find one on the Buy & Sell.

Black Shiba Inu – isn’t he cute?!

And, he was only $150.00!  Clearly, there’s a reason when things seem too good to be true.

It was a scam.  As have a few other puppy ads I emailed from the same site.  They are all “we live in Timbuktu and please adopt our beloved puppy and we don’t want any money except for transportation costs, and we will send you your puppy after you’ve paid for delivery.”   

Clearly, I’m not going to send some random stranger money.  Plus I want to see and pick out my puppy in person.

But, we can’t afford breeder prices – which are usually in the $800 to $1500 range. 

So, now I have a decision to make… Am I willing to just get any puppy, non-purebred that is in our price range, or am I going to scrap the puppy idea completely?